New York is somewhere that most people have an extreme relationship with. They either love love love love it or they absolutely despise it. Having gone to college in New York City, I really truly fell hard for it. I particularly loved the fashion oriented part of it – I felt like everyone cared about the aesthetic and, for someone like me, I always found it really charming. There’s also such an increased sense of motivation in the city – New York is a place for the dreamers and the doers. It’s really easy to feel in your heart that New York is somewhere to “make it.” I feel incredibly proud to be a New York University graduate, and I really enjoyed my experiences there. I made great friends (shoutout to my girls from club 1804!) and I feel like I really grew as a person and learner.
However, it wasn’t really an “immediate” love. Oh, I pushed for it. I begged to go to New York, cried over New York…all the dramas! But, to be honest, I was pushed in the direction of New York from the get go. During my high school performing arts experience, I was made to feel like if I didn’t end up in New York, I would absolutely be a complete, disastrous, failure. Anyone who chose not to go to New York was seen as giving up on their dreams and settling on something that would, ultimately, make them not good enough.
Having been pushed in the direction of New York, I was in a bit of shock in the beginning of my time there. It was hard to see the beauty in it, easy to be lonely. I didn’t feel adjusted to the University environment yet, and was struggling to make friends. My first year (sophomore year – I was a transfer student) I had a terrible roommate situation. Plus, I felt so incompetent in terms of the transportation that I felt anxiety leaving my dorm anywhere that I hadn’t already memorized a route to. I had always had a huge group of friends, so it was really hard for me to come to the city and feel extremely alone.
Ultimately, it was my nannying gig that really got me in terms of learning the city. I still remember meeting my boss, who I ended up absolutely loving to work for. She had two wonderful kids (who joked that they inspired me to be a teacher – but they really did!) I remember walking into the lobby of her building, sitting on the bench, and her asking me if I was comfortable taking the subway. “Oh, absolutely!” I responded with almost a laugh. She ended up hiring me – but that next week I took the subway more than ever. I didn’t want Jake with me, I didn’t want anyone guiding me. I settled with myself that I needed to get a little lost, and I did, but it worked. By the end of my time nannying, I felt more comfortable than ever with the subway and the city.
But don’t get me wrong – New York is an easy place for anxiety to peak for anyone! Sometimes the noises and the crowds can be just too much to handle, especially if already feeling like the wrong frame of mind. But I know my favorite places, I know my “comfort” places in New York. But most importantly – I know that I can handle it, which was something I wasn’t sure of when I first moved there. I will always see the magic of my favorite city – and I’m so grateful to have it so close to my heart! I just absolutely love New York, despite our rough start together back in 2013.
What’s your favorite city? How did you get adjusted to city life?
